There Are Worse Things to Be Than a Shopaholic

On Botox, buying yourself nice things, and refusing to feel guilty for investing in yourself.

Me again.

I'll just say it.

It's okay to spend time, money, and effort on yourself.

There. I said it.

I feel like we've created this strange expectation that women are supposed to look good, feel good, take care of themselves, work hard, be independent, and somehow accomplish all of that without spending any money.

And personally?

I think that's a little ridiculous.

I work hard for my money. I have goals, responsibilities, bills, and plenty of things I should probably be saving for.

But I also have a face. And I happen to like that face.

So, yes, occasionally I'm going to spend some money on it.

I love my Botox.

Thirty-six units. Every ninety days.

Put it on the calendar.

And while we're at it, I love getting my hair done, buying clothes that make me feel beautiful, and occasionally deciding that the version of myself I've been looking at in the mirror needs a little refresh. Sue me.

Here's the thing.

I don't think there's anything wrong with going through a phase where you decide to invest a little extra time, money, and attention into yourself.

Maybe you've gone through a breakup. Maybe you've moved somewhere new. Maybe you've spent years putting everyone else's needs before your own.

Or maybe it's just a random Tuesday, and you've decided you want to look a little hotter.

All valid reasons, in my opinion.

I think sometimes we forget that enjoying the money we earn is allowed to be part of the reason we work so hard in the first place. Of course, I'm not suggesting you max out your credit cards every month in the name of self-care. Financial stability matters. Your future matters. And no amount of Botox is going to make an overdue electric bill particularly glamorous.

But I also don't think every purchase needs to be justified as a necessity.

Sometimes, you can buy something simply because you want it.

Because it makes you happy. Because you feel beautiful wearing it. Because you've spent enough years being hard on yourself, and you're finally learning to enjoy the person you've become.

And I think that's worth something.

I've gone through plenty of phases where I've decided I needed an entirely new wardrobe, a new beauty routine, or some other dramatic personal upgrade.

Have I always been financially responsible about it?

Absolutely not.

Have I occasionally looked at my bank statement and wondered who authorized all those transactions?

Also yes. Unfortunately, it was me.

But I don't regret every dollar I've spent trying to figure out what makes me feel confident.

Some purchases were unnecessary. Some were probably a little impulsive. And some taught me that just because I can buy something doesn't mean I need to.

But others genuinely helped me feel more comfortable in my own skin.

And I think it's okay to acknowledge both.

I could probably find a way to spend $50,000 a month if someone gave me the opportunity.

Would that be financially responsible?

Not even a little.

Would I have an absolutely fabulous wardrobe?

I mean, probably.

But that's not really the point.

The point is that I don't want to spend my life feeling guilty every time I choose to do something nice for myself. Especially when I've spent so much of my life working toward becoming someone I genuinely like. I've worked hard to build a life that feels good to me. And sometimes that looks like going on a walk, reading a book, spending time with friends, or enjoying a beautiful Arizona sunset.

Other times, it looks like sitting in a med spa with a needle in my forehead.

Balance.

I think there's a difference between spending money because you believe something is missing from your life and spending money because you're genuinely enjoying the life you have.

And that's a distinction I'm still learning.

Because the truth is, you can't buy self-love. You can't purchase confidence in a shopping bag. And you certainly can't build an entire sense of identity around what you own.

But you can enjoy fashion. You can enjoy beauty treatments.You can enjoy putting effort into your appearance. And you can absolutely decide that looking and feeling your best is something you want to prioritize.

Being proud of your appearance doesn't automatically make you shallow.

And spending money on yourself doesn't automatically make you selfish.

I think women deserve to enjoy the things they work hard for without constantly explaining why they deserve them.

So if you're in a season of reinventing your style, refreshing your wardrobe, or finally doing something for yourself that you've wanted to do for years, I hope you enjoy it.

Just make sure you're taking care of your future self, too.

Because she's going to want nice things someday. And ideally, she'll be able to afford them.

As for me?

I can't promise I've fully recovered from my love of shopping.

But I have learned that the best investment I've ever made wasn't a handbag, a beauty treatment, or a new outfit.

It was the time and effort I spent becoming someone I actually enjoy being.

The rest?

Well, that's just accessorizing.

And if you're going to swipe your card, you might as well look good doing it.

All my love,
Kaitlin